At Long Last

From letter dated January 30, 1994

My best news is that, after eight years, my stalwart son asked María to marry him on Christmas morning 1993. I could not be happier. María is a darling, absolutely the kindest person I have ever known. I love her dearly and have silently hoped that she would become a daughter. I think I was as happy about the event as they were.

Alex’s “proposal” was completely in character. He always doles out Christmas presents. The last gift under the tree was a lumpy package that he handed to María. She opened it, and to her dismay and mine, it contained a couple of PVC pipe elbows stapled to a card. I decided that Alex had gone senile ahead of me, then María gasped and retrieved from among the wrappings a familiar tiny ivory leather box. It was my mother’s engagement and wedding rings.

They will have a registry wedding. María is divorced and cannot remarry in the Catholic Church. I couldn’t care less. All I want is to be able to refer to “my son and his wife” instead of to “my son and uh-uh-mmmuh.”

 

From report dated March 13, 1994

I order all my stationery from Bucher’s sister Bibba. Shortly after Christmas, I sent Bibba details for the wedding announcements without the date.

The happy couple decided to marry in late February when Carli and Tom would be in Belize following a Guatemalan tour. María and Alex asked Carli and Tom to be their witnesses at the service. Carli, Tom, and I were deeply touched at their wanting them as attendants.

It was so long before I called Bibba to tell her when A&M would be married that she wondered whether the wedding had been called off.

 

Alex was absolutely paranoid about complete secrecy for the wedding. It made things very difficult for me. However, when a 45-year-old son finally is marrying a lovely young woman you have loved for years, you don’t rock the boat.

All was Top Secret. No security organization in the world ever has maintained the level of secrecy I was sworn to and upheld. Alex even gave me strict instructions that the wedding announcements were not to reach Belize until after the wedding. Apparently he thought that if the box were opened for postal inspection, the date would leap off the page and, like fireworks, be blazoned across the Belizean sky.

I could understand Alex’s reluctance to proclaim their plans. It is slightly forbidding to be a first-time bridegroom at age 45. Alex wanted everything done as quietly and simply as possible. The perpetual refrain in the house in the weeks before the wedding was, “It’s getting out of hand!” María and I learned to continue our conferences in private and do exactly as we had planned to do all along.

 

Carli and Tom arrived from Guatemala mid-morning Sunday, February 27th. María’s mother sent over an enormous pot of relleno as her contribution to our private pre-wedding reunion.

The wedding was at 5:00 pm on Monday, February 28th at the Registry, downstairs in our historic Supreme Court building. María’s parents Sr. and Sra. Villanueva, along with her brother Elmer and sister Neima, joined us in the front of the office as we waited for the staff to leave so that the service could begin.

María looked lovely and slim in a gorgeous pale beige lace blouse with high Victorian neck, and a straight skirt of soft material in exactly the same shade. Her “something borrowed” was my mother’s diamond-and-pink-pearl pin, perfectly placed at a vee formed by the lace of her blouse. She had a small wrist bouquet of cream and peach flowers.

The wedding was simple and brief. It was surprisingly sweet despite the office décor, thanks in part to the gracious young Deputy Registrar who officiated. He was serious through the service and friendly after it. He let us use our cameras as we wished.

After the wedding, we returned to my home for a celebration of champagne and bocas (appetizers). María and Alex wanted the quiet family gathering after the wedding instead of a reception (Alex: “Too much commotion”).

Out of courtesy to the Villanuevas, who do not speak English, our conversation was in Spanish. Sr. Villanueva gave the short speech he had been preparing for weeks. I think I said a few words. After the tension building up to the wedding, it was wonderful to relax and enjoy ourselves. I was amazed at surviving two hours in Spanish at a time when my emotions already were in an uproar and my nerves frayed from Making Lists. It was a happy, convivial evening.

 

Alex had agreed (reluctantly) to have a small reception three days after the wedding.

Before I knew about the wedding, I had been thinking of having a party during Carli and Tom’s visit to celebrate our having lived in Belize for Forty years—We arrived on Valentine’s Day, 1954. It was easy to shift mental gears and make the party a wedding reception.

Or it would have been easy had it not been for the secrecy. Alex decreed that even after the wedding we would not tell people about it. If they found out, as inevitable some would, that was all right. But no telephoning of friends-and-relations to report the happy news.

My problem was reception invitations:

• They had to be sent early to avoid conflict with other “do’s.”

• Under no circumstances could I indicate to anyone that this was a wedding reception.

Solution:

• Invitations to my friends or people on both our lists said that it was a celebration of “40 Happy Years in Belize.”

• Invitations to María’s family and special friends indicated that the party was for María and Alex, but were hand-delivered after the wedding had taken place.

Remaining Problem: My wedding-reception list did not include many of the people who normally would have come to a 40th celebration. I would have worried more about hurt feelings if I had not been so swept up in the wedding, Carli and Tom’s visit, and preparations.

I went in to the office every morning, leaving Carli and Tom to fend for themselves. We all worked on party preparations each afternoon. I had been cooking and freezing for weeks. However, many of the things I had chosen to serve could not be done until the last day or two. C&T were wonderful help and delightful company throughout.

 

María’s niece Badra arrived with the wedding cake early in the afternoon of the reception. It was beautiful, a three-tier heart of soft peach frosting with deeper peach touches on the roses. Badra is talented and artistic. She has been making cakes professionally for about five years. María asked Badra to make it a spice cake and got the recipe for Alex’s traditional Christmas/Birthday cake from me as a surprise for him.

The reception was Thursday, March 3rd, beginning at 7:00 pm. By that time, the rumor of María and Alex’s marriage had filtered through. I enjoyed some wonderful double-takes, however, as I motioned toward María and remarked casually to arriving guests, “You know Mrs. Scott, of course.”

María was disappointed that her sister Dulce could not come from New Orleans. They are very close. When the Villanuevas arrived, seven strong, Elmer went back out the door “to get a big package.” He returned immediately, grinning broadly, behind a beaming Dulce, who swept María into her arms.

María’s brother-in-law Fernando is a professional photographer. He kept himself busy throughout with the three cameras slung about his neck. María had told him that Tom would be taking pictures, so Fernando was delegated to operate small family cameras instead of his own larger one.

Tom was our Resident Photographer. We had five rolls of film of the wedding printed before the reception (Tom’s, María’s, and mine). Carli went through them and made up a small album that we left out on the coffee table for guests to enjoy. Tom shot another roll at the reception. It was printed before he and Carli left Belize. My own photographic efforts were abandoned as guests arrived. The film remains in the camera.

The reception was basically one of my usual cocktail parties. We served champagne at about 9:00 pm. Alex wanted things kept simple, so instead of the usual long wedding toasts, I gave only a few words. A couple of his friends followed me with brief tributes and wishes. Ceremony broke up in laughter when a particular friend raised his champagne glass in a toast, said, “I have known them for a long time,” drained his glass, and smiled broadly with no intention of saying anything else.

María and Alex cut the cake and the party proceeded.

 

Nothing has been said about a honeymoon. Carli and Tom gave Alex and María a gift certificate to Chaa Creek resort, so perhaps that will qualify when they have time to take a few days off.